Needles in a Haystack (BAYstack)

I am still processing...

Conference. Pinoys. Pinays. Midwest. It is the latter ("midwest") that does it for me. An experience like no other, meaning many things and experiencing of many emotions.

Curiosity: A 4 hour flight east of California and into the suburbs, full of corn fields, autumn leaves, and the brisk air made me curious of how Filipino Americans got down. How do did they see the world? How did the community organize? What were the issues that impacted the Filipina/o American community? What is Filipina/o American to them? And so the questions would be asked, digging away at the layers of class, religion, beliefs, and the impact of migration and history.

Shock: It is an initial response. The place where I had found myself was not California, nor was it San Francisco. I was not quite surrounded by organizers and students that were as hungry for knowledge and a Filipina/o American identity that went beyond Tinikling and Lumpia. I instead found myself in the middle of what felt like "Friendship Games", which is not necessarily bad, but it was not what I expected as I had expected a conference-like atmosphere where there was a strong interest in activism and change. Rather what unfolded was an energetic enthusiasm about school pride, cultural dancing (despite the mass mispronounciation of"Pangali"), and a variety show which included a Christian dance group. The impact of migration, history, class, and geography magnified the differences between myself, my peers (who I traveled with), and the college students that drove from miles out to express what they believe to be a Filipina/o American identity. It was an identity that seemed distant from "America is in the Heart", I-Hotel, and Ethnic Studies courses. This is not to imply that these are necessary for constructing a Filipino American identity nor that there is one true Filipina/o American identity. But it is these things among many other things that have helped many of my peers in the Bay Area construct a Filipina/o American identity that is critical and connected to the community and history.

Appreciation: I leave the midwest with a great sense of appreciation for the people, spaces, and experiences that I have been a part of and affected by in the Bay Area. I am not implying that I am better or more "Filipino", rather that the people, places, and experiences that I have had and are having in the Bay Area have helped construct a Filipina/o American identity that I am becoming comfortable with and a collective Filipina/o American identity that is critical and understands the urgency of changing the current conditions of Filipina/os locally and globally. This is not to say that ALL Filipina/o Americans in the Bay Area are organized, in fact there is still much work to be done as there are only a few that are organized and/or engaged in activism, but these people and spaces (http://filipinocc.org/, http://www.somcan.org/, http://www.bayanihancc.org/ - just to name a few...) are not hard to find and that the work that is being done is larger than what the numbers imply.

Moving Forward: As I delve back into the work and spaces that I am engaged in, the questions of "How do I get better? Am I using everything that is available to help create change? How do we build from what we have? How do we continue to challenge limitations and stretch the minds of the masses?" sounds just little more different. Once again, I am challenged, not in a way that is overwhelming but in a way that leaves me hopeful, despite the work that is required, as the people, spaces, and resources to answer these questions are not to far away. I suppose one can say that the "needles" in this "haystack" or should I say "BAY-stack" aren't that hard to find.

Columbus and Racism in 2009

"In 1492, Columbus sailed the ocean blue"

Columbus day has recently past and for many us growing up in a the public schooling system, this man is acknowledged for his so-called "discovery" of America. Absent from this narrative was the turn of events that happened to the indigenous people of the land. Event that were nothing short of enslavement and cultural genocide. My point here is not to debunk or discredit Columbus per se but it is to emphasize the fact that Columbus day is a manifestation of the racism and white supremacy that is ingrained in our schools and our everyday language that many of us often overlook, especially in 2009 in this so-called "post-racial Obama" era.

Best believe that the propagation of historical inaccuracies and the negation of indigenous people's and other folks of color's narratives are alive and happening (http://www.everythingesl.net/lessons/columbusday_celebration.php and also http://www.dltk-kids.com/crafts/columbus/index.htm). The power to write history or what we know as history is the power to impact the lenses that we put on as people or what is put on for us. What people know and what people have been taught are perspectives that are not disconnected from a culture, a bias, and a agenda that has very much to do with who is oppressed and who is not oppressed.

So given this situation, we must in 2009 and beyond become creators of language and lenses. We must continue to remember despite how painful our histories are. And while anger is often part of that process, it is a raw emotion, a human emotion that carries the frustrations, the injustices, and traumas ingrained in people's experience. Racism exist in many spaces and it is especially present in everyday language and the institutions that contribute to the languages and lenses that which people use to articulate/view the world, history, peoples, and themselves.

ARISTYLES